But if I did, they might say something like:

Thank the Kitchen

Learn the Food

OMG, Another Customer

UGH (Sigh)

Work Clean, Work Small

The Unawareness Zone

Address it Now

Date Night

Someone Pleeze Say Hello

Are You the Owner?

Am I Too Late?

Which Would You Do?

Harshest Critic

Mixologist

Be a Presence in Your Restaurant

Location Location Location

Eat it. Don’t Tweet it.

Counter ‘Service’?

Never Assume

Take Care of Your Staff

That’s Our Rule

Keep Portland Restaurants Sanctimonious

Well, there you have it. I had a few more gems that I could have added, but thought better of it. I will be off the grid for a couple of weeks, so these will have to tide you over until 2016. Have a wonderful holiday season and see you next year.